The Way I Led Worked - Until It Didn’t
Today, I would like to share a personal story with you. One about my leadership journey.
I grew up in a small town with big dreams. I left home, got my MBA, built my career, and learned what so many ambitious people learn:
Work hard. Deliver. Prove yourself. Keep going.
And I became very good at it. Although sometimes I felt like a dog jumping through hoops. Finish the project. Jump through the hoop. Get recognized. Next hoop. Get promoted. Next hoop. Prove yourself all over again.
Somewhere along the way, I started to feel as though my value was connected to what I could accomplish—and as soon as one thing was finished, I needed to move quickly to the next.
The tricky part was that it was being reinforced. I was promoted. I was given bigger opportunities. By 31, I had become a Vice President.
From the outside, it looked like success. But inside, something didn't feel quite right.
My mind was always busy. I had difficulty switching off and falling asleep at night. I felt pressure and overwhelm, and even when there wasn't an actual emergency, I seemed to be operating with this constant sense of urgency.
Yet I loved my work. I was ambitious. I wanted to contribute and create value. So I kept going.
Eventually, I left corporate life and started Potential Unlimited, my executive coaching and leadership development firm. And instead of changing how I was operating, I pushed even harder.
Then came July 18, 2012. I had gone for an X-ray because of some aches and pains I'd been experiencing.
I remember sitting in the reception area, pounding away on the tiny keyboard of my phone. Responding to email after email. Checking off another box on my mental tally chart each time I hit send.
When my name was called, I walked into the X-ray room. The technician positioned me and asked me to look toward the ceiling while she went to turn on the machine.
And then everything stopped. I fainted. My head smashed against the concrete floor and I was knocked unconscious. When I came to, I couldn't see for hours. My arms and legs were flailing uncontrollably.
I was eventually diagnosed with a severe traumatic brain injury.
What followed was a recovery I never could have imagined. I spent much of the next five years in a darkened bedroom, at times able to see my little girls for only about 15 minutes a day, while my incredible husband, Jeff, carried our young family.
And I approached recovery exactly the way I had approached my career. Push harder. Try harder. Power through. If hard work had gotten me everywhere else, surely it would get me through this too.
Except it didn't.
The harder I pushed, the worse my symptoms became. For the first time, the way I had always operated wasn't working. I had to learn another way.
Through years of rehabilitation—and a lot of learning the hard way—I began to understand the power of slowing down enough to create space. Of being present. Of understanding what was happening inside me rather than simply reacting to everything around me. Of becoming more intentional about where I put my energy and how I responded to pressure.
It wasn't about becoming less ambitious or lowering my standards.
It was about realizing that high performance doesn't have to require self-sacrifice. And that pushing harder isn't always the path to performing better.
As I returned to my work, these lessons became deeply embedded in the way I coached leaders.
For years now, I've coached executives around these ideas. I've spoken about them on stages, built them into leadership programs and workshops, and watched leaders recognize their own patterns under pressure.
Because although their circumstances may be very different from mine, I hear versions of the same things over and over:
I'm carrying so much. I can't switch off. Everyone comes to me. I feel like I'm constantly reacting. I'm doing well—but I don't know how long I can keep operating like this.
And the reality is that today's leadership environment isn't making this easier.
More change. More complexity. AI and evolving technology. Constant connectivity. Competing priorities. Teams carrying their own pressures.
The pressure isn't going away. But how we lead within it can change. And that's exactly why I created Lead Without Losing Yourself 6-week, online group coaching program.
It was about realizing that high performance doesn't have to require self-sacrifice. And that pushing harder isn't always the path to performing better.
As I returned to my work, these lessons became deeply embedded in the way I coached leaders.
For years now, I've coached executives around these ideas. I've spoken about them on stages, built them into leadership programs and workshops, and watched leaders recognize their own patterns under pressure.
Because although their circumstances may be very different from mine, I hear versions of the same things over and over:
I'm carrying so much. I can't switch off. Everyone comes to me. I feel like I'm constantly reacting. I'm doing well—but I don't know how long I can keep operating like this.
And the reality is that today's leadership environment isn't making this easier.
More change. More complexity. AI and evolving technology. Constant connectivity. Competing priorities. Teams carrying their own pressures.
The pressure isn't going away. But how we lead within it can change. And that's exactly why I created Lead Without Losing Yourself 6-week, online group coaching program.
I wanted to create something different from a keynote or a one-time workshop.
I wanted the opportunity to work closely with a small group of leaders over six weeks—to go much deeper into this specific challenge and create the space for real, meaningful change.
Over six 90-minute group coaching sessions in Lead Without Losing Yourself, we'll explore things like:
how pressure is affecting the way you think, respond, make decisions and lead
the patterns you default to when the stakes are high
moving from autopilot toward greater awareness and intentionality
creating space and clarity when everything feels urgent
loosening the need to control everything and strengthening trust
navigating the isolation that can come with leadership and creating stronger connection
shifting from self-sacrifice toward self-leadership
practical tools you can use in real time when the pressure is actually happening
And you'll be doing this alongside a small group of other accomplished leaders.
Because there is something incredibly powerful about realizing that the leader sitting beside you—someone who also appears capable, successful and accomplished—is navigating many of the same pressures you are.
We learn from each other's experiences. We challenge each other's thinking. And we create a level of conversation that we rarely have the space for in our everyday working lives.
And right now, there are only a few days left to join at the early-bird rate.
The value of this level of coaching and access is $15,000.
But through September 30, the investment for the complete six-week experience is just $1,599.
You'll receive six 90-minute live group coaching sessions and work directly with me—an ICF Master Certified Coach, a designation held by only the top 3% of credentialed coaches worldwide, with more than 15 years coaching leaders through pressure, change and complexity.
If you're reading this thinking: This sounds like me. Pay attention to that.
Because one of the biggest lessons I've learned is that you don't have to wait until the way you've always operated stops working to learn another way.
You can be ambitious. You can perform at a high level. You can care deeply about your work, your team and your results. And you can learn to carry the pressures of leadership differently.
Early-bird registration ends September 30.
If you've been waiting for the right time to make a shift, this may be it.
Learn more + Sign up for Lead Without Losing Yourself!
Enjoy the ride!
Carey-Ann Oestreicher, MBA, MCC
CEO & Lead Executive Coach
Potential Unlimited
